Episode 2 – Parenting through COVID

Rob 0:00
Hello, and welcome to the RAD dad show a podcast by dads for dads. I’m your host, Rob Schilt, joined by my co host, Salvador minervini.

Sal 0:09
What’s up everyone?

Rob 0:11
That’s the second time we did this opening, and he still delayed the response and must be in the zoom meeting.

Sal 0:16
No, no, I was there. Come on, you didn’t hear me.

Rob 0:21
So this is our first zoom. This is our first zoom podcast. When we are doing a podcast, this episode will be about COVID-19. Coincidentally, my son had a fever over the weekend. So we’re in our self imposed quarantine. So all my friends and family will be much appreciative. I will see everyone on the other side after 14 days. And we may or may not make it, I may go crazy, we may have to put rubber Rubber walls into this house. And it’s not a big house. So Sal and I have had much different experiences with covid. I’ve been working since the kids pretty much started school from home. And that started around early to mid March, I think the kids were home maybe a week or two before me. But Sal has worked, I think one or two weeks, and then kind of went back.

Sal 1:12
So I was off, I was off for three weeks, then went back, I was actually fortunate enough to be home, the first three weeks when the kids got off of school. So I was able to assist with the onboarding, or the, you know, initial onset of the remote learning. Thank God, my kids got Chromebooks for Christmas. So it was easy in that aspect. We weren’t sharing laptops and stuff like that. It’s funny, you

Rob 1:43
say that my, my youngest son is doing summer school. So he actually has had some, you know, obviously, as a speech delay, and we will talk about that later in later episodes, but and just you know, the impact on the family and how you overcome things like that. But we’re thinking about buying him a Chromebook. And we’re in July now. So initially, we shared and I mean, it’s, it’s tough the work from the work school, everything is tough. You only had about three weeks staying home and working from home, what’s been your favorite COVID experience work personal, whatever, initial experience with COVID it was kind of scary, I’m sure everyone else feel the same way. But the the amount of time I’m getting to spend or got to spend with my family, this time, I’ll never be able to make up again. So the bond that we forged, you know, through those three weeks that I was home was tremendous. Now after those three weeks,

after those three, three weeks, what go ahead

Sal 2:48
after those three weeks, the best part was there was hardly anybody on the road. I’m an early bird. So I’m on the road early. So morning traffic is really is not that heavy. And if it is it’s usually overnight construction. But on the way home, I wouldn’t have to touch the brake until I got off the exit to get off my exit. So that was the best part during the whole you know, the hiatus.

Rob 3:16
So for those of you who are not from the New York, New Jersey, Connecticut area, in New Jersey, everything’s a highway so it’s not like it is in the south where you can turn left on, turn left on any pretty much major highway or, or in Pennsylvania. Literally, everything’s a jug handle. I remember when I went to to college, friend of mine making fun of a New Jersey, you can’t you can’t turn left, but sorry, I go off on a little tangent there. Because Sal talking about exiting is you know, going off on his exit and it may not relate to everybody pulling us back on topic. I think my favorite thing I have to agree with you the amount of time you get to spend with the family. I don’t think that in probably five years, I would spend as much time as I have over over the past four months. Being home every day seeing my kids every day pretty much whenever I want being able to eat dinner with them. It’s just incredible. It’s an incredible experience that you know, I’m pretty sure you know yes COVID horrible. My scare this this weekend, put my heart My throat in and I hopefully it was just a blip and nobody else can get sick of my house but you got to take the silver lining with it. And I think the silver lining is the amount of time you get to spend with with the family. Now saying that we’re not teachers, right? We don’t have the patience these teachers have. And you know, we have to play the role and my wife always says this, you know, teacher, mother cook, clean, like you have to do all of these roles. And teacher has the luxury of being the teacher while we’re the disciplinary and that’s that’s that’s the tough part by separating that out and making your kids aware of The differences so from a from a remote learning how did they so Sal has, three girls I’m not sure if we cover that in the first episode but you know, how did your girls handle the the remote learning?

Sal 5:10
First, it was tough treated almost as as an extended extended weekend. But like I mentioned before, I was fortunate enough to be home once this all started with them starting remote learning. I had to lay down the law, you know, drop the hammer, this is no different than if you were going to school you’re up by 730 wash face brush teeth. bed is done that is made. And we’re you’re ready to have breakfast and ready to learn at eight

Rob 5:39
did they stick to it. Were they good with it?

Sal 5:42
For the most part they were Yes

Rob 5:44
Because I know the boys they were they’re a hot mess. So they get up. So Sal and I have the paradigm. So my kids go to bed at eight, but are up at five. Sal’s I don’t know what time they go to bed. But they’re there also they get up a little bit later. But it’s you know, from that regard, my boys when we first started, they kind of treated as the weekend they get up, they go try to play video games, they try to turn on the TV, we had actually put a lot of parental controls on the different devices to make sure that they couldn’t take advantage of the situation. And it’s funny, it took almost until the summer to really get into a rhythm because during the summer, they don’t have anything like there’s absolutely nothing they have to do. We’re not saying summer camp, we’re kind of a little nervous about that. We’re going to especially because my younger guy is susceptible we decided not to send them to to any any camp and that’s really the good and bad because they’re spending a lot of time home but at the same point, they’re spending a lot of time home. So there’s only so many things me my wife both work so it makes it a little difficult and we’re planning things out. It’s It’s tough. You know, today I had to make sure they were doing some stem project but since the summer started, they’ve kind of gotten into the rhythm of reading and writing in the morning. That’s what we expect.

Sal 6:01
It’s good to get into

Rob 6:54
so what has been your besides podcasting right so we started this up almost a month ago building a website building you know, starting the podcast scripting and I we spent a lot of time scripting and putting coming up with ideas, right, but what what else have you been doing besides podcasts, I knew we were going to be cooped up inside the house. And it wasn’t going to be a brief encounter with the Coronavirus. So I made it a point that every day we walk three times a day morning just after the morning break noon just after lunch and either before or after dinner. Because if we didn’t do that kids would have gotten stir crazy as the weather got warmer, then we transitioned from walking three times a day we transition to bike riding three times a day, which was nice.

My our guys done by riding his bike, which is one of the things we’re trying to accomplish the over the summer is get him on a bike though it took my older one until I think eight, seven or eight until he was able to ride but hopefully the younger guy will pick it up a little quick.

Sal 7:54
You know, you don’t want to argue with the kids, you know, they’re being home all day. And you’re trying to get out and get them out of the house. And it’s just like, you know what, I’m just gonna go pour myself a glass,

Rob 8:06
Yeah, exactly. And, and I think for most people, it’s it at the end of the day, even though you’re working at home and your kids are around, you don’t get to spend that time with them. So for me after, during the days over, I like to spend you know, some an hour with them if it’s it’s reading. So in the morning, we read so that’s the big thing now, right since the summer started, but in the evening, we’ll watch TV for an hour. We’ll, you know, obviously we dinner all together. So if I’m done at six reading at six, by the time we’re done at seven kids are going to bed today. So at seven we’re kind of like winding down, I want them I don’t want video games, maybe a book maybe maybe TV or something but more about spending time with with the family. And really, you know, doing something that that works for all of us. I don’t want to force them to do everyday activities. I do make them do push ups sit ups and jumping jacks. So I really can’t say I’m not but saying

Sal 9:04
What the hell you doing running a boot camp over there

Rob 9:06
I got to man and if they don’t want to walk you got to do something. Right. So it’s, you know, it’s definitely one of those things. So for me the one of the one of the big things that that I during during COVID is because I’m in retail and there’s a lot of impact in the retail industry. They started reaching out to old colleagues and and making sure that anybody I knew or anybody who needed really help had the help they needed. They got in contact with recruiters, they got help on their resumes. And they were able to to network with the appropriate people. And that was one of the things that I kind of did as a side thing for my colleagues. I wanted to make sure that they were capable of doing what they need to do to get their next job. I like doing it. I’m not gonna lie. I do like doing it. And the fact

Sal 9:16
That ‘s nice man, that’s awesome.

Rob 9:58
It’s not for me, but It also makes you feel good, right? So, at the end of the day, you know, my job not to do that. But at the same point i, some people who I’ve been two organizations for over six years, create relationships and friendships, you know, even with your subordinates over that time and, you know, to help them and get them to the next place and help them in any way you can, is as important

Sal 10:21
And its your good deed for the day.

Rob 10:23
Yeah, it’s your good deed for the day. But it’s also you know, as, as a manager, as a leader, you know, those those are the things that I think are important that I look at my leader, you know, in, in my leaders, the people that I follow, Sal I know you got to pool but are you gonna send the kids to summer camp? Or are you guys going to the lake again again? Or

Sal 10:43
no camp, No lake, No town pool. No, nothing. We, as you said, we put a pool in, finally, which I thought would never happen. One because my wife was always anti pool, and two try to find a pool because of the coronavirus, and everybody staying home was was close to impossible. And then after finding the pool, the installer was the tricky part. You had to use the installers, that pool company recommended Or else, you know, you get into warranty issues, but I kind of convinced the guy to come sooner, thank God, because we’ve had a hot couple of weeks. So that was actually pretty good.

Rob 11:26
I mean, I would throw some Italian stereotype in and say you probably muscled them but apparently that’s not a good idea these days. So

Sal 11:38
no, too many people get offended.

Rob 11:40
Yup

Sal 11:41
I kind of I kind of offered the guy some additional money to to move me up in the schedule. So so he did. And I’m happy. Kids are happy.

Rob 11:51
Yeah. Nice. Nice. Pool.

Sal 11:53
How about how about you, you got any plans for summer camp or a pool or lake or anything like that?

Rob 12:00
No, we’re definitely not doing like we were waitlisted. Anyway, which is amazing. Because there was like our fourth year, we decided and we were kind of happy with that. So once we realized what was going down kind of in April, May we pull their name anyway. And then with the pool, we’re not doing it because as you saw with like the town communications is interesting, and to say the least, about how they’re segmenting it out. To be honest, it just seems like a unnecessary risk for a family who has in my mind, my wife call says we have a high risk person but essentially someone who’s susceptible to getting sick but that’s To be honest, we we’ve kind of locked it down to like three families and and you guys so you know it’s four families in total. I don’t know why I said didn’t say poor families. I just continue making fun of myself.

Sal 12:50
It was like, yeah, three families. Oh, and then there’s you and

Rob 12:53
then there’s

Sal 12:56
Thanks Rob

Rob 12:57
Your wife is going to kick my ass next time she sees me.

So you know, we’re trying to limit the the population we interact with. And that’s, that’s really key for us just to make sure that my little guy doesn’t doesn’t get exposed anything. As for vacations, I am going to take one probably later on in the summer. But it’s probably not going anywhere. It’s just to stay home and veg out and do anything but sit in front of a computer for 10 to 12 hours a day. So it’s definitely one of those things where you we had two major vacation plans for this year both blown up, I’m not even sure if we’re getting our money back for the hotel, we had to put a downpayment on and that was in June

Sal 13:41
Oh get out of here.

Rob 13:42
No, the hotel wasn’t open. So I don’t know if they’re open now. So we’re gonna go to New Orleans. My wife is infatuated with New Orleans. I’ve been there once at a much different type of party. So I wanted to take her fam down there and we had a couple friends who went down there last year and loved it and the kids loved it. So we’re excited to go I was excited for rice and beans and they New Orleans I you can eat your way through New Orleans forget partying the food is amazing. Oh my god, some good places I may recommend and actually put on this on our liner notes because they were really good. And we won’t even get paid for for clicking through to that. But

Sal 14:20
there’s never been but that’s one on my bucket list.

Rob 14:24
Now that you’re married and you have kids like it’s a different experience than you would have had it when you’re in your early 20s. It’s already your mid 20s whenever you got married early, so not me. There’s definitely a different type of partying. But there’s also a lot of culture in New Orleans. It’s amazing and the food music Oh my god the Mississippi. I don’t know it’s a something about it. People in the south are so nice. It’s incredible. It’s nice to walk around. Funny enough. I went for a bachelor party and I ended up walking around early in the morning trying to find coffee for all of us and just walking aimlessly in new orleans and it was nice It was relaxing, beautiful. I really enjoyed it. And it’s it’s a place if you haven’t been for our listeners and you Sal I highly recommend. It won’t be I don’t believe on our family vacation episode. But I do recommend it. And you know if you go down I think it’s something you can do with the kids probably a four day three night type of thing. But if you’re coming from the New York area, the flights are limited. So you have to pick and choose your your battle not to deviate or anything but so we had two major major vacations planned, both got canceled. really stinks. The second one was going to the Bahamas, the boys hadn’t been Bahamas, my youngest choose to so it was a big trip. We’re going my dad and his family. So that was a very, that was gonna be a fun time too. And that got blown up. We’re not comfortable. We’re also then thinking about you know, Sal, you’re you’re aware but driving down to North Carolina. Didn’t happen in either. So I think we’re staying in good old jersey and not really going anywhere. Are you guys going anywhere this year?

Sal 16:02
No. Pool is it backyard fun. And maybe day trips down down the beach. That’s about it. Yeah.

Rob 16:12
Are you gonna venture to Jenks again?

Sal 16:15
And possibly, possibly, I think my wife was going to take a day trip today with the girls. We buy the passes every year. They go on sale in April. My kids love it. We’ll go down, test it out. See what it looks like. You know, it becomes too scary and dangerous for the kids. Stay home. backyard adventure.

Rob 16:38
I agree. So Sal, I’m gonna throw in a new bit, and it’s gonna be off the cuff. I know you’re not prepared for this. But I do want to do one bourbon review. An episode. So this will be Episode Two, episode one three and four do not have a bourbon review, but five should so I think we started so we have we have one bit that will come a little later. But I want to do this almost on a recurring because we’re both big bourbon guys. Whiskey bourbon. I’m not really a scotch guy and don’t like the scotch. It’s too smoky for me. But bourbon and whiskey. We do enjoy. So since I’m throwing the challenge, I will let you choose the bourbon that we discuss. We’re not bourbon just so everyone knows. It’s old school night, school night work night, whatever. Not that everyone over 21 not a problem. But we’re not imbibing right now. But what is the

Sal 17:34
what do you think? I think if we weren’t I think if we were drinking this podcast would sound a lot worse

Rob 17:40
Yeah. So just so everyone, throw this out here. We tried drinking and podcasting, there was disaster. Sal, at one point, I don’t think he remember what he was saying. Not that we were drunk we were buzzed enough that it just became a full mess. So there was no professionalism. So we were

Sal 17:58
babbling buffoons,

Rob 17:59
we scrapped that and decided to do a different route. Whereas if we are in person, and we are podcasting, we will have a celebratory drink after the fact. So what is your bourbon that you want to review?

Sal 18:13
Widow Jane

Rob 18:15
Oh, that’s a good that’s a controversial one for us. So I found widow Jane, I do not like it. And that is not a very popular opinion. I think it’s too has too much of a bite. The subtleties of the the bourbon don’t don’t come through for me. And I think there’s a group of in town who actually went to the distillery and kind of went through and saw their process, but it just too, is too much of a punch and I know it’s not I know you don’t agree with that. I know a lot of people don’t agree with it. But when I compare it to other whiskeys and Bourbons around that range, I feel there’s better selection or even cheaper that are better selection. What is your take on one? Oh, Jane,

Sal 19:01
very different than yours.

Rob 19:03
Yeah, I know. That’s why I like that. That was a good, good one.

Sal 19:07
I don’t think it’s got that much of a bite. I think it’s smooth. It depends. I mean, sometimes I’ll have it with ice cube or sometimes I’ll drink it neat. For the most part. I like drinking my bourbon neat to me. You get the full effect of bourbon you get the the aroma the flavor. I know some people they take medicine dropper and they squirt a couple drops of distilled water. I like it neat

Rob 19:34
does anybody we know actually do that. Do the distilled water.

Sal 19:37
No, no, I’ve seen people do it.

Rob 19:40
Okay, I’ve read that people do it because it opens up the bourbon a little bit more. Ball so you like it need I do enjoy one rock. And now when I talk about one rock, I’m not talking about the ice cube. Grandma’s frigerator I’m talking about a good old block of ice me and Sal both have our own mold style prefers balls. I prefer the squares just because I still can’t perfect the balls. Sounds really wrong. Sorry.

Sal 20:06
No, come on, stop. You said you’d like my balls.

Rob 20:10
Your balls are great every time I try to make a hemisphere. So they’re, they’re difficult and then they become a pain when you unscrew ah my God, I hate it. I just probably have the wrong mold. But the squares I have a couple square molds that I keep pretty fresh. And and to be honest, typically I’ll have one rock, and that rock, whatever I drink that that’s typically if I’m having one on my own. I’m using that one rock, I’ll do two fingers. And that said it’s nice. It’s nice relaxation after the day, but it’s you know, I’m surprised I really am for people who like the winter jam, don’t say it has a bite. It’s funny because a lot of the bourbon and funny enough I’m surprised out chose that because it’s the one that we definitely have a difference of opinion on if he had chosen. I mean, I can think of rattle off probably 10 to 20 that we have similar opinions on. And I think that it’s it’s funny because our tastes are similar. But with widow Jane I it’s not there for me. It’s just not. And maybe I have to retry it. But so I retried old elk and oh my god it was we can review that one later, but that sometimes we try it. So I know for those people who are bourbon or whiskey drinkers, if you drink bourbon or whiskey sometimes some of them and I’ve heard this with Stagg Jr, you have to put it into a decanter and let it open up. Because the first and again, we can talk about other ones later, so don’t comment on it. So you can’t see me because my video is off because my Wi Fi sucks. That’s, that’s one of the one that’s one of the tips that I’ve heard is sometimes you have to put it in the decanter because it doesn’t give you the full the full aroma doesn’t give you a day needs to open up a little bit because it’s been, you know, in a cask and then bottled and whatever, you know,

Sal 21:58
I’ll save my comments on that for another day.

Rob 22:01
Yeah, I think that’s another one we can definitely comment on. But so you know from from that perspective, not a fan of widow Jane. Sal is to stay there for me. So moving on to our second bit that we’re running on every episode is our dad lessons. So dad, lesson number two. So work we’re labeling them for each episode. very inventive. I know man up and let your kids cry it out. Or else you will have to deal with them sleeping in your bed until they’re teenagers and I am saying this based on past experience. But I will caveat it with my older son very much like sleeping or in bed. My younger son who he didn’t let cry it out either. Literally sleeps by himself and falls asleep at eight o’clock every night no matter where he is. It can be on the couch, it can be in my bed. It can be in his bed. Most nights it’s on the couch because we’re kind of hanging out as a family. How about you? How about the girls? My first daughter we did we attempted to cry it out. And boy was it a brutal first two nights of crying it out. First night was almost three hours.

Sal 23:11
My oldest daughter she’s a night owl. She’ll stay up past my wife and I but she’s also the one that sleeps the latest. But yeah, crying it out. I highly recommend good just like Rob said if you don’t then going to be a third, fourth or even fifth person in your bed. My other two girls for the most part sleep in their beds, no issues. Some nights still act like it’s a sleep over. For the most part. They all sleep in their beds. Okay. All right. I think that’ll do it for episode number two. Thank you everyone for listening. Be sure to tune into our next episode where we talk about the new normal. If you like what you heard, share with someone you like or maybe dislike. If you have any questions, comments or want to give us some feedback. You can hit us up at theraddadsshow@gmail.com that’s a wrap

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